strange musings of a distracted spunk

I never realized how green the Pacific Northwest was. Though Princess Pointful corrected me and said that we are technically in the Pacific Southwest currently as we are in the southwestern portion of Canada. Hello, Vancouver. Green? Trees? Ah-choo!

So a basic recap of my Northwestern/Southwestern journeys:

-Once again, United Airlines wins. Apparently this time, they forgot they needed a pilot to fly the plane. This apparently didn’t occur to them until AFTER we boarded the plane. And I was so excited that we might actually leave on time for a change. Hour delay? Hello, my old friend.

-I’m still five years old at heart. The Seattle Science Museum was probably my favorite part of the Seattle experience. How often do you get to walk around in a butterfly conservatory? Or test your flexibility skills? (By the way, at twenty three years of age, my flexibility range was 23.0. The normal average for people my age was 12. I am awesome.) Or take a picture inside a dinosaur footprint? Check, check, and check.

-I can do a kickstand on 1 & 3, a snare on 2 & 4, but not with a top hat on 1, 2, 3, and 4. It’s sort of like trying to rub your tummy and pat your head at the same time. I have a new respect for drummers, seeing as I can only do two of the three at any given point. (Experience Music Project; good for releasing your inner rock star.)

-Just because you can take a golden capsule to the top does not make you Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory, Space Needle. In fact, you need to take a few lessons from the John Hancock Observatory in Chicago or any one of the tourist destinations in New York. Clearly labeled markings on what one is looking at is helpful. Not a computer screen with exclamation points a la Super Mario Brothers and a big octopus. (Apparently, the Giant Pacific Octopus lives off the shores of Seattle. Good to know.)

-The Underground Tour? Totally worth it. Where else do you learn about drunkards falling off the street and into a ditch somewhere between 5-30 feet below? Or the fact that 87% of Seattle’s revenue in the late 1800’s/early 1900s was accounted for by the high percentage of “seamstresses” in Seattle, where nary a sewing machine was in sight. Occupational hazard? Syphilis.

-A harrowing experience at the Seattle Bus Depot was fun for no one. Forty minutes just to get my ticket because the computers and a printer was down. Travel luck, you strike again! However, we did befriend a native Vancouverian on the bus ride home. It appears he was eavesdropping on our conversation and found us particularly entertaining. Which we are. But still. Between him and PP, a four hour bus ride went by impressively quickly. He even accompanied us through customs and on the train and bus ride home. Wearing a kilt!

-Vancouver has sea buses. As in…a boat. That’s a form of public transportation. It’s a bus! But it’s a boat! But it’s a bus! Ah!

-Also, there’s a suspension bridge. 230 feet above a rushing river kinda suspension bridge. Like the ones you used to see in a playground that would bounce when you walked on it. There was always the asshole (usually me) who would jump on it and make it swing and cause you to lose your balance. I stifled that impulse, but I did run the last fifteen or so feet of the bridge back, just cause I could. In addition, there are treetop adventures. Even MORE suspension bridges in the trees. Basically, if you’ve ever loved playing in a treehouse, this is totally the place to go.

-American Gladiators. ‘Nuff said. I’m pretty sure this is one of those things that you can only do while in another country, like the “It’s okay to cheat because it’s another country” kinda philosophy.

-Vancouver has a police museum! I didn’t really know what to expect, just that it’d be something different and completely unique to Vancouver. When I travel, I like to find places that you won’t find anywhere else. So we went. And we figured it’d be just about an hour at the most. After two hours, nunchuks, Ninja throwing stars, an autopsy room, a morgue, and crazy interesting exhibits, we finally staggered our way out from Vancouver’s police history. They are the only police force that I have ever heard of that have Harley Davidsons as part of their motor vehicles. Red ones, at that. Go Vancouver.

-Totem poles scare me. If I were a pioneer and I came across a totem pole of a demon-like figure eating a human, I’d run right back in the direction from which I came. However. Totem poles with stories aren’t as scary. Unfortunately, the Museum of Anthropology doesn’t share the stories of most of its totem poles, which makes it difficult to really absorb as much of the history as one possibly could. However, it does have one super cool exhibit of a Raven saving humankind in a clamade of cedar, with natural light shining down on it. It’s pretty groovy.

One thing that both Seattle and Vancouver have that are unusual is the abundance of mountains and water. It’s absolutely stunning and gorgeous, especially when in contrast to all the greenery. Flying into Sea-Tac Airport was like no flight I had ever taken before. Additionally, both have a style of architecture that is completely different from the neo-classic, brick, and steel architecture I’m used to from the East coast. There is so little European influence here, it’s refreshing.

With that said, I’m jumping back into the states where I eagerly await naughty text messages for all of sixteen hours before I get on my sixth plane in three weeks and make my way to a completely different climate. Hot and steamy. Hello Thailand.